Counter-Offers:
Avoiding Enticement
You've found the job
you wanted but your present employer wants you to stay.
You are trying to make the right decision. What should
you consider?
The pay is better,
the working environment is better and the future looks
good. You've submitted your resignation expecting that
your decision will be respected. Hold on, your boss
wants to talk to you and change your mind. This isn't
quite what you thought would happen. You thought there
would be a smooth departure, fond farewells and a brand
new start. What's going on?
You are about to receive a counter-offer. This could be
happening for many reasons. Your expertise is valuable,
your contacts with the customers are extensive, you are
an asset to the firm. Your boss tells you this. What
your boss is not telling you is that you are presenting
to him/her a problem which has to be solved. Whenever
someone resigns it creates an immediate crisis and
sometimes the best way to resolve that crisis is to do
whatever it takes to get that person to stay.
Counter-offers can
take the form of instant salary increases, promotion to
higher responsibilities, promises of future promotions,
vacation time increases, and so on. It can be very
tempting to surrender to the pressure and seize the
opportunity. It seems like the employer has finally come
around and is seeing things the way you want them to.
Before you agree to stay, however, there are some
important issues to consider:
I
It has taken your
having to submit your resignation to obtain the
conditions you want.
N
Nothing has really
changed. After the dust settles, the same issues that
made you decide to move to a new situation will likely
reappear.
T
The decision that you have made to choose your own
future is not being respected. This is a decision that
you have note made lightly.
E
Even if you receive everything you want, it is with the
implicit threat of leaving, these benefits did not come
naturally, your employer was forced to act.
G
Goodwill with your present employer has been strained
and there will never be quite the same sense of trust
that existed prior to your resigning.
R
Review time may bring some surprises as what was
promised may not materialize in the fullness of time.
I
Intimidation may be used as a tactic to make you feel
bad about your decision and to play on your fears of
change.
T
The employer may try to make you
feel guilty about not being a teamplayer, letting down
your friends, throwing away your hard work.
Y
- Your integrity and the value of your word and the
promise you freely made in accepting the new employment
are in the spotlight.
Certain
things may be said to you:
" You are
too valuable for us to lose you "
" Things are just starting to turn around, why leave
now? "
" We were just about to promote you but had to keep it
confidential "
" What do you need in order to stay? "
" I didn't know you felt this strongly about it "
" You'll be letting us down if you leave now ! "
" I thought you were happy here ! "
" Why would you want to throw the benefits of your
seniority here? "
" Everyone here likes and respects you and will be sad
if you go "
" The boss wants to meet with you before you make your
final decision "
These and similar comments create confusion and buyer's
remorse. The fear-of-change emotion takes over. Career
changes are challenging because you are about to leave a
comfortable job, friends, location, etc. for an unknown
opportunity where you have to prove yourself all over
again. Fear of change can cloud your thinking. No matter
how good the new opportunity is - it can sometimes seem
more comfortable just to stay.
Sometimes the emotional pressure brought to bear on you
can be intense. An employer who is competitive by nature
may take this on as a crusade to "win" you over and
deprive your new employer because they just don't like
to lose. Trying to make someone guilty about their
decision is a classic example of this type of emotional
manipulation.
Of course, we all want to think we are irreplaceable,
and want to believe all the flattery, but accepting a
counter-offer or appeal to stay is ultimately not in
your interests. Also, why are they willing to accomodate
your needs as you are leaving? Why haven't they
taken the initiative before this to meet your
expectations and create this plan for you?
Employers do not like to be fired. Employer-managers are
concerned that they may look bad to their superiors, and
this could affect their standing in the company because
they are judged partly by their ability to retain staff.
When a contributor quits, morale may suffer. Further,
your leaving might jeopardize an important project,
cause a greater workload, or affect a vacation schedule.
It's never a good time for someone to quit, and it may
prove very time consuming and costly to replace you,
especially considering recruitment and training
expenses. It is much cheaper to keep you - even at a
higher salary.
Remember, it's not about you. While your employer may
truly consider you an asset, and may genuinely care
about you personally, you can be sure that your
interests are secondary to your company's profits and
survival. In other words, flattering offers and comments
are attempts to persuade you to do something that is in
your employer's best interests, and not necessarily
yours.
A counter-offer demonstrates disrespect for your
decision and commitment to the new company. You've
committed to the new company, which has made plans and
accommodations around you. They are counting on you.
Stand by your word. Everyone will respect your
integrity.
After all, how did your boss get to his/her position?
Chances are he/she came from another firm as the result
of a career move. You have made your decision to leave
and it deserves to be respected.
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